ماجد الحدادي
27 -06- 2008, 06:53 PM
1.
Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper withfire at one
end & a fool at the other
2.
Love affairs : Something like cricket where
one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test
3.
Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor
degree and a woman gains her master
4.
Divorce : Future tense of marriage
5.
Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of
the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through
"the minds of either"
6.
Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number
present
7.
Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such away that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece
8.
Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculinewill-power is
defeated by feminine water-power
9.
Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage
10.
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks,nobody listens &
everybody disagrees later on
11.
Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a
feeling you have never felt before
12.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do notread
13.
Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight
14.
Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
life
15.
Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their
mouth
16.
Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
actually do
17.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit
to decide that nothing can be done together
18.
Experience : The name men give to their mistakes
19.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions
20.
Philosopher : A fool who torments himself duringlife, to be
spoken of when dead
21.
Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell insuch a way
that you actually look forward to the trip
22.
Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally
falls into a river
23.
Optimist : A person who while falling from EiffelTower says in
midway "See I am not injured yet."
24.
Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the lastletter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY
25.
Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich
26.
Father : A banker provided by nature
27.
Criminal : A guy no different from the rest...except that he got
caught
28.
Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you
are early
29.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your
Confidence after
30.
Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills,and kills you
with his bills
Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper withfire at one
end & a fool at the other
2.
Love affairs : Something like cricket where
one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test
3.
Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor
degree and a woman gains her master
4.
Divorce : Future tense of marriage
5.
Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of
the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through
"the minds of either"
6.
Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number
present
7.
Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such away that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece
8.
Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculinewill-power is
defeated by feminine water-power
9.
Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage
10.
Conference Room : A place where everybody talks,nobody listens &
everybody disagrees later on
11.
Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a
feeling you have never felt before
12.
Classic : A book which people praise, but do notread
13.
Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight
14.
Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
life
15.
Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their
mouth
16.
Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
actually do
17.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit
to decide that nothing can be done together
18.
Experience : The name men give to their mistakes
19.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions
20.
Philosopher : A fool who torments himself duringlife, to be
spoken of when dead
21.
Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell insuch a way
that you actually look forward to the trip
22.
Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally
falls into a river
23.
Optimist : A person who while falling from EiffelTower says in
midway "See I am not injured yet."
24.
Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the lastletter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY
25.
Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich
26.
Father : A banker provided by nature
27.
Criminal : A guy no different from the rest...except that he got
caught
28.
Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you
are early
29.
Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your
Confidence after
30.
Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills,and kills you
with his bills